Miguel Olivo and His Magnificently Bad Discipline

Am I an awful person for thinking Miguel Olivo oughtn’t be a Kansas City Royal anymore? He isn’t the worst player in baseball history, and not even the worst in the league right now. But he’s frustrating, and when his lubed-up glove gave Arizona a couple of runs in the 4th inning, I did some yellin’ in The Rookies’ executive chat room. There were a lot of capital letters and swearwords involved.

In a fit of fury, I maaaay have even referred to him as Miguel [Fellatio-administering] Olivo. I regret that choice of words now. All the same, Miguel C. Olivo is a special kind of awful when it comes to most facets of the game of baseball.

"The fuck is a strike zone?"

For example, his “plate approach” – and I’m using that phrase generously here – is horrifying. Here’s a nugget for you: Olivo has reached base on swinging strike three attempts three (3) times. He has walked two (2) times.

How is it even possible for someone, much less a catcher, to outrun a throw to first MORE TIMES than he takes four bad pitches? Come on, Miguel, I want to like you, but if you can’t walk once in a while (to go with your random occasional homers), I can’t cheer. I refuse to root for a guy whose OBP is .279.  Among MLB catchers with at least 150 PA, only two are worse than that.

Oh, and to go along with those two (2) walks, Olivo has struck out 53 times in 155 plate appearances. This season, he’s only seeing 3.54 pitches per plate appearance.  Hack, hackity-hack. Blegh.

Unfortunately, Zack Greinke has adopted Olivo as his personal catcher, even once declaring him as “the best catcher in the world.” (Side note: This was during Greinke’s superhuman phase. It’s a shame he’s become a mortal; I would have loved a fierce Greinke/Halladay Cy Young race that lasted all season.) So Royals fans are sort of stuck with him, and have had to suffer through more of his nonsense while John Buck is on the DL and manager Trey Hillman is still terrified of giving any starts to Brayan Pena.

Hating on Olivo would be so much easier if he didn’t seem like such a stand-up guy. He and his lovely wife have a few kids of their own, and have adopted a couple others who were having a rough life. He probably also rescues puppies and cures cripples in the streets of Kansas City. He may even know a cure for cancer. But he still infuriates me on a near-daily basis, and I could think of a few catchers I’d rather have behind the plate than Miguel C. Olivo.